Como se livrar de um colega de quarto sem cometer um crime

How to get rid of a roommate without committing a crime

Life is divided in steps, or periods; we were all at one time just little kids crying and crawling all the time. After childhood, we all became teenagers, and then adults after high school. These phases in life are similar in one aspect: we were almost completely dependent on our parents for practically everything. However, after high school, one of the characteristics of adulthood is being accepted at a university. Many students attend college far away from home, which both represents the separation from their parents and creates the necessity to rent an apartment close to the university campus. In some cases, you can make arrangements to live together with your close friends. However, many students end up living with strangers; in other words, people that they have never seen before, people from different countries, cultures, personalities, and goals. Sometimes it can work pretty well and the students can become very close friends, learning from one another and growing together. Regardless, living with a stranger can often lead to a huge relationship problem. What should you do if you face this kind of problem? You sometimes might have desire to kill your roommate, but of course, you do not want to commit a crime and be arrested. Therefore, the purpose of this essay is to show you how you can get rid of a roommate without committing a crime, or in other words, this essay will show you how to try to resolve your relationship problems in a pacific way.

The first step is the dialogue, or effective communication. Dialogue sometimes is hard, especially if you are an inpatient person. Communicating implies to try to understand the other side and apply empathy. In relation to this issue, Kerry Patterson, famous for writing the book Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High, said: “People who are skilled at dialogue do their best to make it safe for everyone to add their meaning to the shared pool--even ideas that at first glance appear controversial, wrong, or at odds with their own beliefs. Now, obviously they don't agree with every idea; they simply do their best to ensure that all ideas find their way into the open.” Over time, dialogue has been shown to be the most powerful tool to resolve problems and conflicts among different people. Often, many people never actually resolve their conflicts because they had never really tried to practice dialogue before. It is important, therefore, to strive to do your very best to communicate with your roommate, as this is a very beneficial resource. Furthermore about this issue, Tulio Maranhao said: “He who knows only his own side of the case, knows little of that. His reasons may be good, and no one may have been able to refute them. But if he is equally unable to refute the reasons on the opposite side; if he does not so much as know what they are, he has no ground for preferring either opinion.” (1990) As this statement implies, many people are suffering, simply because they are so proud that they rebut reasons on the opposite side.

If conversation does not work, or if you are too shy to talk about these problems with your roommate, the next step is to become aware of your rights. Try to find out the policies of your contract and learn the rules of the complex where you live. These rules can be your best friend if you are having troubles with your roommate, because if he, or she, is not following the complex rules, you can make a complaint about it. Eckhart Tolle said, "Every complaint is a little story the mind makes up that you completely believe in." (2006) Thus, according to Tolle, the complaints begin when you think and believe that you are absolutely right and the other person is the completely wrong. In the majority of student complexes, if you have three complaints against you, you will be evicted, forcing you to leave your apartment and find a new one as soon as possible. This is a highly useful way to get rid of a roommate, since they cannot do anything about it if they are breaking the rules. In addition, these complaints can help your roommate to ‘repent’, realize that he or she must change, and ultimately become a better person. This idea is supported by the thesis of Kevin

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